ajenn17
When a passenger insists on punching you while you are driving, refrain from hurting the passenger. Save the punches for a later time when you are not in a moving car!
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Shirley Hour
Be sure, young padawan, that when you are sitting in the passenger seat of a car, do not play "PT Cruiser Bruiser" or "Slugbug [Color]" with the driver.  It may lead to potentially dangerous situations.
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ajenn17
When becoming a "t-shirt" ninja, remember not to choke one self while taking the shirt off. If you choke yourself, it defeats the purpose of being a ninja!
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Shirley Hour
When selecting kiwis, be sure to listen to the kiwi to hear what it has to say; it may want to be eaten.
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ajenn17
Be careful when you ask a driver to look at something cool, the driver may take their eyes off the road for a larger amount of time than expected and come deathly close to a curb!
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Shirley Hour
Use your inner qi to slice through tough objects.

More specifically, kiwis.
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ajenn17
Always go with your intuition. Sometimes you get those feelings for a reason. A feeling that could have potentially prevented living with a crazy roommate or spending a miserable two weeks in a cell-like room. Always go with your intuition.
Shirley Hour
When going into oriental markets, do not simply read things out loud without thinking.

For example:

BuBee:  Fat Ants
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Shirley Hour
True story, bro.
ajenn17
Do not drive behind Asian drivers in the parking lot. This results in many cuss words and possible decrease in life span.